because it's my birthday

Today...because it's my birthday...and because I can....I decided to do things that I wanted to do.

• I slept in.  Well, I slept until 7:45 (a.m. that is).  Some might say this is a horrible attempt at sleeping in. But I'll take what I can get.  

• I went to Zumba.  I thought about skipping out on my Zumba class but I realllllllly LOVE Zumba.  So I went to Zumba.  I always feel so good after Zumba.  I am trying to figure out more ways to use the word Zumba.  

• I shaved my legs.  This might be tmi for some of you folks (am I too young to say folks) but it was necessary.  I think Patrick might have kicked me out of the bed pretty soon.  But I also was wearing shorts, which meant I actually had to.

• I had lunch with my friend Jenni and her two sweet kids.  For those of you who have not met Jenni, she is one of my favorite people to hang out with.  I have not known her long but I like her even more each time we are together.  She has such a calming, gentle spirit.  She is funny and laid back but also sweet and gentle...  qualities I certainly admire.  She makes me feel at ease...taken care of.  

And just as I was going to sit down to spend time with the Lord...also on my birthday to do list, I got an upsetting phone call.  My Grandma, whom I share my birthday with, called to say thanks for the birthday package.  I asked her if she enjoyed the pumpkin bread and pictures.  She said there was no bread...no pictures.  She did however receive a huge piece of art...a wall hanging.  I was so confused.  She must have thought I had lost my mind...to send her a piece of art in the assisted living home she is in.  A mystery!

So needless to say, I was mad and frustrated and did not want to spend time with the Lord anymore.  Just call me "Sulky Sally".  

But God is good and he persevered in me.  I spent some time with him asking him to fix this mess.  He brought to mind an old song that I sang in high school at youth group...Create in me a clean heart...  The lines in the song that stand out for me today are

                          restore unto me, the joy of thy salvation

                                    and renew a right spirit within me


That is exactly what I needed...a right spirit.  Oh how he can change my heart in an instant...in one breath.  Just call on his name and he will come to the rescue.  He did not fix the situation, he fixed my heart.  I am not sure who got the pumpkin bread, the pictures and the birthday card.  I am not sure if I will ever get these things back...but my God is good in all things...and that is what I will take from this.

Back to my do do list...

• Wear some perfume.  I know this sounds silly...but I wanted to smell pretty on my birthday.   

• Take a picture of myself.  Trying to be happy with who I am...who God created me to be has always been a struggle for me.  I have often thought others are better than me, have a better life, better marriage, better house, better job...the list could go on and on.  But over the last few years, I have felt this sense that God created me to be me...not someone else.  

         I am trying to embrace me.  Embrace who I am.  

         To be comfortable with myself.  

In an attempt to do this, I had Patrick take a picture of me today.  A picture of just me.  No makeup, no lipstick, no photo shop.   

Raw.

Just me.

Brandy 

 October 4, 2012

32 years old

And that was my birthday in a nutshell.  

I think Patrick has a sitter lined up for tonight...so I think a date is also in store for me.  

Happy Birthday to me!